The Six People in Every Barkada Suroy. Which One Are You?
Every barkada trip in the Philippines is run by the same six people. The names change, the van does not. One of them has the receipts down to the centavo, one of them is still “on the way” while the ferry is boarding, one of them has been asleep since the engine started, and one of them has just said “one more, medyo blurry” for the ninth time in front of the same waterfall.
Eight questions, about ninety seconds, nothing stored. Answer as the person you are on the trip, not the person you are in the group chat, because those are different people and everyone in the van knows it.
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The six people in every barkada suroy. Which one are you?
The six, in full
The Treasurer keeps the trip solvent. Fuel contribution collected before the doors close, every toll and parking receipt photographed, the split done by what each person ordered rather than by head, because the Sleeper had one bottle of water and the Kain Na Officer had a whole lechon belly. The sheet is shared. Two people will owe money for a year. The Treasurer will not forget.
The Designated Human Tripod is the reason the trip has a record. They direct, they frame, they climb onto a rock nobody else would climb to get the angle, and they are in almost none of the results. Their recap the next morning is the version of the trip everyone’s parents will see. Send them your clips. Nobody sends them their clips.
The Latecomer is on the way. They have been on the way since the group was formed. They will reach the meeting point forty minutes late with a bag of warm pandesal and an apology so sincere it is forgiven again, and they will be the last off the ferry, the last out of the water and the last to reply to the tally. Every barkada has one. If you cannot identify yours, check the mirror.
The Navigator drives, or rides in front and might as well. They know the detour by barangay name, the fuel station that is actually open, and the stretch of the Transcentral where the landslide advisories apply. They do not swim long, they do not drink, and they do not sleep, and the trip does not exist without them. The jeepney guide and the bus terminal guide are for the trips they sit out.
The Sleeper is asleep. They were asleep before the engine caught, they slept through the coast road, the church, the roadside lechon and the town where the van stopped for forty minutes, and they will wake at the destination asking why everyone looks tired. They are the best-rested person in the group and possibly the country. Their contribution is the photo the Tripod takes of them with their mouth open, which is the most-liked image of every trip.
The Kain Na Officer was not on the original brief and belongs on it, because no Filipino barkada has ever traveled without one. They know the lechon place and the other lechon place. They know which carinderia on the detour has the good humba. They buy the whole tray of banana cue. Their itinerary is a list of things to eat with a waterfall added for balance, and the group has quietly adopted it as the actual itinerary every time. See the Cebu lechon guide for what they already know.
Why every barkada needs all six
Take one away and the trip changes shape. No Treasurer and the money argument happens at the ferry instead of in a spreadsheet. No Tripod and the trip happened but there is no proof. No Navigator and you are the ones asking a habal-habal driver in Dalaguete which way the sea is. No Kain Na Officer and everyone eats at the resort restaurant and pays for it twice. No Sleeper and there is nobody to laugh at. No Latecomer and you leave on time, which sounds better than it is, because the Latecomer is also the one who brought the pandesal.
Seven or more in the van and the roles start doubling. Two Treasurers is a schism. Two Tripods is a photography workshop nobody signed up for. Two Sleepers is fine.
Frequently asked questions
What is a barkada?
The Filipino word for a close group of friends, usually the same group since school, college or a first job, who travel together on the same terms and in the same roles for decades. The word covers the group, the loyalty and the argument over the bill, all at once.
What if I got a role I disagree with?
Ask the barkada. They have known for years. The Sleeper never believes they are the Sleeper, and the Latecomer is the only person on earth who thinks they are usually on time.
Can one person be two roles?
Treasurer and Navigator, often, because both are the responsible one. Tripod and Kain Na Officer, sometimes, because both are documenting the food. Sleeper and anything else, never. The Sleeper is a full-time role.
More games and quizzes live in the Suroy Arcade. The generation quiz is the next argument in the van.
Suroy Wear · Statement Series
Six people, one van.
The Retro Van Tee, for the Navigator who never gets the aux cord and the Sleeper who never sees the road. ₱999, and the Treasurer can split it.
